Since having EmJ 11 weeks ago, I have been through a lot. Having a fit after the birth, having a biopsy (which I still don't have the results for), starting my masters degree, raising a baby etc and all in a town where I have no family.
You might be wondering where I am going with this post, but bear with me :)
Through all of this, my friends who I knew before having the baby haven't really known how to help me through the bad parts, and as my family are so far away I haven't really spoken to them about any of the bad parts as they can't do anything.
The people that have got me through the bad times (and yes I know it's only been 11 weeks) is the people I have met at a baby group.
I go to a baby group every Friday morning for 3 hours, and sometimes go to lunch with them after. They can't really understand some of what I have been through but most of it at least one has been through the same thing (even when I found out hubby had been sending messages to other women asking for sex while I was looking after EmJ ), and it helps so much to know that other people have been through it.
The best thing though is that if I am worried about anything regarding EmJ I have people I can talk to. We have a group on WhatsApp so even if it's not a Friday and I need advice they are always there for me. There is always someone who has been through the same thing with their baby and can offer advice, and what I love the most is that there is always someone who has had a worse week with their child than you.
This might sound nasty to say, but I will say that knowing that someone else's child has played up more than yours is a very nice feeling! And when EmJ is very well behaved (which she always is) at the baby group and someone else's baby is screaming for no reason it does give me hope that maybe I am a good parent and my baby is happy and thriving.
So my advice is make time to go to a baby group. You will get invaluable advice about anything you could ever ask about having a baby, and maybe even get good mates from it too! There is one woman who I would count as being my best friend now and I wouldn't have thought I would have met my best friend the day after giving birth!
What is your advice for this week?
#advicefromtheheart
Xo
Great post. It's so true that these groups can really help. Lots of the mothers in my group all had second children around the same time so now we're meeting with our second babies and the toddlers are all playing together. It's always fun to catch up. #fromtheheart
ReplyDeleteMy social life has SKYROCKETED since becoming a mum. I'm a bit of a recluse but baby and mum groups rock - you immediately have conversations topics and common ground. Thanks for sharing #fromtheheart
ReplyDeleteMy goodness! I can't believe what you have been through these past few weeks. Well done, you're a strong one. I totally agree with your emphasis on joining a social group. For me, although I didn't socialise heavily, it was just a way to make sure I was connecting with the world at least once a week. Thanks for sharing #fromtheheart
ReplyDelete